These poems I wrote last month. I started to feel overwhelmed, but it seems anymore when I begin a poem it turns in unexpected ways. It either ends with hope or some moral. Here are two that I wrote to release emotions about the things that strain my mind. I apologize for their length but I hope regardless you will enjoy them. The second I think is self-explanatory. It deals with my instinct to run from difficulties I face. The first reflects back on my second post. If you haven't read it please do!
Displaced
Faith
Prayers didn’t work; neither did
wishing on stars,
Your voice in my head made it
worse,
Call me weak; call me stupid, can
you do it better?
Past episodes seem to disagree.
With the sentiment that your
logic is law,
I fell faster and faster…
A child I was but no longer am,
I noticed father’s detrimental
imperfections.
My feet walk a path with no
directions,
Alone but lost it seems,
Tears still burn the same as they
did before,
And I couldn’t wait to grow up.
Losing way in the midst of
confusion and despair,
Only silence and cold to embrace,
Lost at sea beneath the surface
absorbing rays,
Can’t see what can’t be found.
Again and again attempting to
reach the crest of waves above,
I fell faster and faster…
Waiting for arms to catch me, to
let me cry.
Hold me until the aching fades
soft.
Appearing faster than I could
cover or disguise,
The scars that still lay visible.
Every flaw caressed with gentle
arms and hands,
Is this my own true angel?
All exposed in the light, no
longer beneath the surface,
Remnants of the deep still cling,
I stare at a familiar face I want
to run from and hold close,
One decision, I must choose.
Over a wall and off a ledge I
follow wings with determination,
I fall faster and faster…
A path unforeseen taken with
anxious wonder,
Start over once again.
His honest sapphires convey more
than my reflection,
A conclusion and reality I never
thought I’d find,
That I hold his heart when I hold
his hand,
And he’s been beside me all along.
Tripping
Over Footsteps
Can’t slow down, can’t stop,
Faster than thoughts,
Than the car coming round the bend,
Overcome every skipped heartbeat,
Sweat that slips down skin,
Shakes that won’t stop,
Run…
Past the people, the places,
Situations of uncomfortable
tones,
The sounds fading in the back,
The oh-so familiar faces of
Pretend friends, lovers, loathed
relatives,
And resentments held within.
Run…
Away from monsters under the bed,
Ghosts who creep through dark and
dreams,
Phantoms of memory materialize,
The insanity that leaks in,
Concrete plaguing doubts,
Inner arguments that can’t be
won,
Run…
To a fortress of hope and
solitude,
Where fear dares not try to tread,
The heart is where home is.
Circle over circle in endless
frustration,
Back to where it all began, the
beginning,
The crooked path indented with
footsteps.
Slow…
Hit the mirror.
Face the worst known enemy.
Accept the blemish, the scar,
The substance beneath the film,
Realize that each step leads
back,
That this fight won’t be won,
Pause…
Until the face seen each morning,
Is loved with understanding,
That all thoughts compressed
create
Something worthy for keepsake,
Linger…
Moments shall pass yet emotions
endure,
The past still affects the
present
Until those times are dealt with.
When the pulsing slows,
Breaths resume a pace of norm,
The finish line is crossed.
Next new phase begins and till
Finality of death knocks,
The strength of beat after beat,
Giving the will to go on,
Silencing its melody of a story
Only then you may
Stop.
